Thursday, March 26, 2009

Tough Decisions

We all come to a crossroads in life when we have to make a tough decision. These are often decisions we don't want to make which I suppose is what makes them tough! This semester has not been very successful for me which is disheartening as it was to be my last semester of pre-reqs. So many things have gone wrong and there have been a lot of difficulties in a variety of areas. I have decided to withdraw from my two courses this term. It is mathematically impossible to get the grade I need to have with what is left in this term. Jon and I decided it is foolish to continue the rest of the semester with the stress level I've been carrying when I won't end up with the grade necessary. I will go today and officially withdraw at the school and pursue enrolling in courses for the summer term and getting in touch and following up with other programs.

All of this has been a slow learning process in accepting something other than what our plans are, trusting that there is a greater plan than our own and how important it is to get out of our own way so God's plan can take shape without our making things so much more difficult! It's still so hard for me to gauge the right road for either of us at this time. As our pastor stated a few weeks ago, however, there is a reason we are giving a lamp to light our path. We're only meant to see one step at a time. Our foolish human nature tries so hard to run through that path but all we end up doing is stumbling along and running into things that we could have otherwise avoided if we'd just been taking it one step at a time. The place I sometimes wish we were in life is exactly where many of my dear friends are, which I admit makes it a bit more difficult to still be here! I'm well aware that everything happens in its own time and God has a reason for not giving us what we want when we want it (usally because we're being foolish lol). If I'm not meant to start a program this year I have to accept that and trust there is a reason not yet seen.

Right now, today, I am going to use the extra time I will have not studying or going to class in the most productive ways I can (or at least I will make a valliant effort!) and perhaps get some projects accomplished here at home, provide my husband more home-cooked meals, and take the time to dig my heels in and launch my Arbonne business. Who knows what the future may hold? I want to make the absolute best of what we have been giving in this moment. Isn't that all any of us can do? Make every moment count and count our blessings in every moment.